Fatherhood as a Rite of Passage: A Ceremony for Jack Whitehall

 
Sometimes, life presents you with opportunities that you don’t fully grasp until you’re standing right in the middle of them.

When an English production company reached out, they had one request, could I create a ceremony for a father-to-be?

They had found my postpartum Mother Roasting offerings and my work with La Cerrada, the Closing of the Bones Ceremony, a sacred ritual for mothers transitioning out of their fourth trimester here in Los Angeles. But this time, the focus was different. This wasn’t about a mother; it was about a man who wanted~needed~to mark his transition into fatherhood in a meaningful way.

That was all I knew going in. No other details. No backstory. No names. 

But what spoke to my heart was this: Here was a man, fully willing to step into something ceremonial to help cross the bridge of resistance between who he had been and who he was becoming. That alone was enough for me to say yes.

 I designed a ceremony that would guide him into fatherhood. The  crew flew in from London to shoot this episode with me here in Sherman Oaks, California.We began with a labyrinth walk, allowing him to reflect on what he was leaving behind. He then released those parts of himself in a fire ritual, making space for the father he was stepping into.

Finally, he and his own father entered our sacred space prepared, where I led them on a shamanic journey, wrapped in rebozos from Antima Textiles from Oaxaca, held in the rhythmic heartbeat of the drum.

What I didn’t know until much later was that the father-to-be and his own father were actually well-known comedians with a hugely popular Netflix series, Travel with My Father. I had no idea. None whatsoever! Which, in hindsight, made for the most organic, lighthearted, and joy-filled ceremony I could have ever imagined.

It wasn’t until after filming that my eldest son, who records music in London casually dropped, “Wait… you did a ceremony for Jack Whitehall and his dad, oh this outta be good?!” Cue my post-ceremony Oh. My. God. moment. And my first thought? Dear Universe, please don’t let me be edited into some LA woo-woo stereotype! 🤣🤣🤣

Thankfully, while much of the ritual didn’t make the final cut, what was captured was something truly special. You can catch it in the very first episode of Fatherhood with My Father, where Jack steps into this deeply personal, yet hilariously heartfelt, rite of passage. 

This entire experience made me realize just how much we are missing when it comes to supporting men in their journey to fatherhood. We expect them to just show up, but emotional readiness, identity shifts, and the unspoken fears that come with this transformation are rarely acknowledged.
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Being a mother to four adult men... I want to change that.

This ceremony was just the beginning. I want to expand it into something larger, a dedicated offering for fathers (or groups of fathers) who are standing at this threshold, unsure of what’s next but ready to explore, relate, and prepare. Because whether you’re a first-time dad or navigating fears of repeating past cycles, you deserve a space to process, release, and step in with clarity and purpose.


Let’s start the conversation Papa.....

• Could you allow yourself the vulnerability to admit that stepping into parenthood is scary and have a space to be heard?

• What parts of yourself would you need to release in order to fully embrace fatherhood?

• What fears do you carry about becoming a father, and how might a ritual or ceremony help acknowledge and ease them?

• If you had been given a sacred space before becoming a parent, what would you have wanted to process, say, or let go of?

• How can we, as a collective, create more spaces where men are invited to prepare for this transition not just logistically, but emotionally and spiritually?